whoa.

Never Ever Lyrics- All Saints

A few questions that I need to know
how you could ever hurt me so
I need to know what I've done wrong
and how long it's been going on
Was it that I never paid enough attention?
Or did I not give enough affection?
Not only will your answers keep me sane
but I'll know never to make the same mistake again
You can tell me to my face or even on the phone
You can write it in a letter, either way, I have to know
Did I never treat you right?
Did I always start the fight?
Either way, I'm going out of my mind
all the answers to my questions
I have to find

My head's spinning
Boy, I'm in a daze
I feel isolated
Don't wanna communicate
I'll take a shower, I will scour
I will rub
To find peace of mind
The happy mind I once owned, yeah

Vexing vocabulary runs right through me
The alphabet runs right from A to Z
Conversations, hesitations in my mind
You got my conscience asking questions that I can't find
I'm not crazy
I'm sure I ain't done nothing wrong, no
I'm just waiting
'Cause I heard this feeling
won't last that long

Never ever have I ever felt so low
When you gonna take me out of this black hole?
Never ever have I ever felt so sad
The way I'm feeling yeah, you got me feeling really bad
Never ever have I had to find
I've had to dig away to find my own peace of mind
I've Never ever had my conscience to fight
The way I'm feeling, yeah, I just don't feel right

I'll keep searching
Deep within my soul
For all the answers
Don't wanna hurt no more
I need peace, got to feel at ease
Need to be.
Free from pain - going insane
My heart aches, yeah

Sometimes vocabulary runs right through my head
The alphabet runs right from A to Z
Conversations, hesitations in my mind
You got my conscience asking questions that I can't find
I'm not crazy,
I'm sure I ain't done nothing wrong
I'm just waiting
'Cause I heard this feeling won't last that long

Never ever have I ever felt so low
When ya gonna take me out of this black hole?
Never ever have I ever felt so sad
The way I'm feeling yeah, you got me feeling really bad
Never ever have I had to find
I've had to dig away to find my own peace of mind
I've Never ever had my conscience to fight
The way I'm feeling, yeah, I just don't feel right x4

You can tell me to my face,
You can tell me on the phone,
Uh, You can write it in a letter, babe
'Cause I really need to know

You can tell me to my face
You can tell me on the phone
Uh, You can write it in a letter, babe
'Cause I really need to know

You can write it in a letter, babe
You can write it in a letter, babe

yeah boi...

ok, so i'm gonna transfer blog again. because i chose to have a new life, i have a new blog. (weeeeh) haha!

just look for my LJ account. if you look closely to this blog, you'll find it here somewhere. (yan ah, hiiiiiint!) but take note, for friends only. well, some of the entries. =) so if you want to snoop my blog (hahaha), u have to add me up. ok? good. =p

yan ah...malinaw tayo diyan. haha

bye, blogger...i'm gonna miss you....*sniff*

I Do

when i'm done with thinking, then i'm done with you.
when i'm done with crying, then i'm done with you.
when i feel so tired, then i'm done with you.
everybody feels this way sometimes, everybody feels this way -

and i do.
you can't hear it, but i do.
you can't hear it, but i do.

you're trying to convince me that what i've done's not right.
i get so frustrated, i stay up every night.
you ask me for an answer, and i'm so tired and i'm up in the air.
everybody feels this way sometimes, everybody feels this way -

and i do.
you can't hear it, but i do.
you can't hear it, but i'm feeling this way
just because you say

i will be ignored.
i will be denied.
i could be erased.
i could be brushed aside.
i will get scared, and i will get shoved down,
but i feel like i do beause you push me around.

i'm starting to ignore you, i've doubted you so long.
i'm tired of over-thinking, i know you don't belong.
now i'm asking questions - no one pushes me around.
everybody feels this way sometimes, everybody feels this way -

and i do.
you can't hear it, but i do.
you don't seem angry, but i do.
i do.

~*~

yea,yea, yea! hehe. =)

Debut ni anne calma later....partaaaaaay!!! =)

heartbreaks make me sick. ehk.

ok, so na-aadict nako sa poems ni Pablo Neruda. wee! =)


I Do Not Love You Except Because I Love You

I do not love you except because I love you;
I go from loving to not loving you,
From waiting to not waiting for you
My heart moves from cold to fire.

I love you only because it's you the one I love;
I hate you deeply, and hating you
Bend to you, and the measure of my changing love for you
Is that I do not see you but love you blindly.

Maybe January light will consume
My heart with its cruel
Ray, stealing my key to true calm.

In this part of the story I am the one who
Dies, the only one, and I will die of love because I love you,
Because I love you, Love, in fire and blood.
- Pablo Neruda

hehe. got that from joey's blog. *thanks love! ♥

sunday morning...

Don't Speak-No Doubt
You and me
We used to be together
Everyday together always
I really feel
That I'm losing my best friend
I can't believe
This could be the end
It looks as though you're letting go
And if it's real
Well I don't want to know

Don't speak
I know just what you're saying
So please stop explaining
Don't tell me cause it hurts
Don't speak I know what you're thinking
I don't need your reasons
Don't tell me cause it hurts

Our memories
Well, they can be inviting
But some are altogether
Mighty frightening
As we die, both you and I
With my head in my hands
I sit and cry

Don't speak
I know just what you're saying
So please stop explaining
Don't tell me cause it hurts (no, no, no)
Don't speak
I know what you're thinking
I don't need your reasons
Don't tell me cause it hurts

It's all ending
I gotta stop pretending who we are...
You and me I can see us dying...are we?

Don't speak
I know just what you're saying
So please stop explaining
Don't tell me cause it hurts (no, no, no)
Don't speak
I know what you're thinking
I don't need your reasons
Don't tell me cause it hurts
Don't tell me cause it hurts!
I know what you're saying
So please stop explaining

Don't speak,
don't speak,
don't speak,
oh I know what you're thinking
And I don't need your reasons
I know you're good,
I know you're good,
I know you're real good
Oh, la la la la la la
La la la la la la
Don't, Don't, uh-huh Hush, hush darlin'
Hush, hush darlin' Hush, hush
don't tell me tell me cause it
hurts Hush, hush darlin' Hush, hush darlin'
Hush, hush don't tell me tell me cause it hurts

No more.

yeah, Sergio...NO MORE.

if freedom you ask, freedom you're gonna get from me. that's what you want, right? this is what you really, really want and i'm gonna give it all to you. we're both tired of pretending that we're still gonna work. good job, you convinced me that we're not anymore. and hearing the "truth" convinced me more...though it hurt more. but imma be alright. coz i'm tired of pretending that you're still happy with me. i deserve better than that.

you're not worth my tears anymore...everything's not worth it anymore. i've had ENOUGH.

i just wish that you'll be happier this way...if not, bahala ka na. i wont fall for it again..I WONT.

i hate to say this, but after i cried kanina, i realized, i dont love you anymore. nah, not true..but i'll just tell my heart that i dont love you anymore. i'll keep it from loving you. it has been through so much pain already..bumibigay na siya. tama na, ayoko na..

harsh? nah.. bitter? a little. it's still painful but i'll let it all out. i think i've cried it all out, thank you very much.

"Wag kang mangangambang
Baka wala ka nang ibang makita
Na lalake na magmahal sayo
At hinding hindi nya sasayangin ang pag-ibig mo..." -Halaga, Parokya ni Edgar

so true. i need a man who will never waste my love for him..a man who will love me the way he should love me. isang lalaki na alam ang tunay kong HALAGA.

so anyway...

i watched World Trade Center with joey awhile ago. the movie was so touching. nakakiyak pre. haha! i enjoyed it..medyo tumulo luha ko eh. buti di napansin ni joey. haha! thanks love! thanks for the pasalubong also =) i ♥ you love! =)

here's a song for you. this will be the last song i'll dedicate to you..

Much Has Been Said- Bamboo

Much has been said
Said you never leave
Why'd it have to be
Harder than it had to be
Don't you throw blame
You were part of this
Wasn't suppose to end
With us just walking away
So many times we tried
Holding on to the pain but in my baby's eyes I see my shame
Asking why you had to leave
Wasn't I strong enough to make you see
That the biggest part of this it's not about you or me
But just be wrong if we held on

So Maybe tomorrow we'll find
A taste for the old days hard lessons
We've left behind

This mirrors an open door I can barely stand to see myself I don't know what to do anymore
I'm crying out for help
Ohh lord
Much has been said
Will I never learn
Keeping my fingers crossed
Praying for my luck to turn
But I can't complain
I'm living it easy
Job's keeping me busy
Going Crazy
Can't describe the way it felt
When you left said your goodbyes
It just seems crazy for me to think
That I'll find love a second time
But we all know how it all wraps up in the end
Maybe tomorrow we'll find..
Ohh lord..
What am I leaving behind
Sweet how we see the big picture when you're life's not on the line
I know the way but do you see what I see
A tortured life always second guessing the bookie
Pot money on the table thought that was all I had to do
Never came home
Never said a word to you
No one ever said it was going to be easy

Easy start over again this time this time
Let's do it right
Start over again this time this time
Lets keep the fires burning

Nice to know you, Sergio. Goodbye..

tatlong araw

ostrich land was OH-SO-FUN! =)

last wednesday, me and some of my friends went to OStrichland (as they would call it), somewhere in PAmpanga. super fun coz the 3 days we were, sobrang food trip. daming fooooooooood!!! haha! super bum kami dun! eat, sleep, eat, swim, play cards, eat, swim, play billiards, ostrich sight seeing, eat, swim and play charades (haha), videoke all night long, sleep, eat, eat and more EAT. and oh, alot of drinking. yeah boi. ehe. =) too bad we were just there for 3 days....sobrang bitin! argh! ooooh! the ostriches were so cute! and the sheeps too! baaaaaa! hahaha! =p

oh, thanks to vicka and dang for singing a very special song to me last thurs night/friday morning. =) most memorable song from the trip was HALAGA by parokya. yeah boi...mahal ko kayong dalawa. *tugsh* haha! =p

also, thanks sj for the very wonderful time in your ostrich farm...sa uulitin! =)

fun, fun FUN! =)

ok, so i missed you during my stay in Pampanga...kasi ba naman, ang labo ng pag-uusap natin. oh well. you said that "we" are still on probation...so malabo nga talaga. *sigh*

be content camie...just have faith and trust. =)

* i love you.. =) and i miss you...hope to see you soon. =)

ok, so walang kwenta yung entry ko. haha. well, i'm too tired to write. basta, check my multiply nalang if you wanna see the pics of our pampanga trip. funfun! =p

"Ang pag-ibig, ganyan talaga
Ako'y nilamon na ng pag-ibig
Ganyan talaga, masaya" --Masaya, Bamboo

heaven on earth

and we're on again...yeyeye! =)

no begging, no insisting..just a lil bit of crying (hehe)...i just let it all happen. =) a deal's a deal. haha. =p

anyway, i had a very fun day today. i was with sergio's family at galle. yeah boi, bumanding kami ni tita. waha. =) while the boys were playing at Tom's World (oh, boys...tsk. hehe), tita (oh yes) and i had our bonding sessions. i went with her to look for a cocktail dress, which tita had interest with blouses instead (haha), that ended us up having a foot spa. yihee, saya. haha! =p sarap kasama ni tita...super daming kwento and stuff. i had lotsa fun hanging out with sergio's mom. *thanks tita! =)

ehe. =)

well, we're back from scratch again. well, i just hope and pray that everything will work out pretty well now. please, please, please???

* thanks so much...♥♥♥ you to bits! mwah =)

ostrichland na tom til friday...yeyeye! excited na meeeeeee! waha. ; )