breaking free

i've decided to let go...=c

last friday, we (blockmates) had this sem-ender inuman session at Drew's katip. sergio was there...at first, i was so trying to pretend that i'm ok and stuff. yun yung napagusapan eh. pretend that we're not a couple anymore right? anyway, ang habang pagtitiis yun super..then finally, after having too much alcohol in my system already, i gave up. bumigay nako. super thanks kay kyla for saving me from my misery. she somehow enlightened me that time. thanks dear. :) that moment was too mucht hat i don't wanna make kwento it anymore. yun.

my barkada (vicka, melai & dang plus SJ--i love you so much guys!) witnessed those dramatic moments i had. so, after Drew's we went to Cantina para makapag-chill and maglabasan ng sama ng loob. i love my barkada. they always make me happy. =) after Cantina, we went to Cafe B-something (i forgot) to eat crepe's! well, they had crepe's while i had some tea becasue i was too drunk and wasted already. then finally, we went to dang's place para mag-sleepover. yun naman. super, big open-up session na etoh.

i just arrived home from dang's place. i stayed there ulit yesterday. nag-glorietta/greenbelt naman kami and esquinita-eastwood-then back to esquinita during the night. i love dang. sobrang bonding kami kahapon. it's like those sex and the city talks..haha. basta yun. i love you duday! tom ah? *mwah*

sa lahat ng taong pinagkatiwalaan ko nung friday, please? alam niyo na yun. super i trust you guys..

and to you, i know you read my letter na. i meant everything i wrote there. right now, i'm struggling with all of my emotions. i miss you, i still want you...i still want us. but i'm gonna be ok..i have to. what you asked from me, i gave it to you. i'll just wait for our time again...i'll wait for the time you're gonna come back. i know you are, but now isn't just the right time. God knows when and i'll just trust Him. everything's so hard for me right now that i just wanna break down and cry. but i'm so tired of crying coz it wouldn't give you back to me right? i know God gave me this challenge to learn from my mistakes. and i iknow i i could and will get through this coz He wouldn't give me something like this if He knows i couldn't handle it. Right?

Still hurting, still wanting...i so friggin' miss you already. =c even if you're gone, i'll still prove to you all the things i said before. though if i'm doing this without you, i'll keep on proving and showing to you that i've already changed. NO MATTER HOW LONG THIS WILL TAKE I WILL FUCKIN' WAIT.

and i hope it's worth it. =c

is it wrong if i say I still love you? coz i really, really do...*tear*